Sept 4th 2024- MTC Drop off

You know what is funny? Just looking through these pictures gave me a visceral reaction. It was a total trauma response. My heart started pounding and I started breathing a little faster. It shocked me. He has been out for 7 months! 

I think people make you feel like you if you aren't like it was the best worst day! I think it can be a hard day and still be glad that they are going. I am so happy Ty is on a mission. There is honestly nothing on this earth he could be doing that is better for him. I have always wanted him to go and I couldn't be more proud of him for doing it. 

But this was not the best day. It was a hard day. 

My boys are my whole life. My life is helping their life. And I love it that way. But since this is sort of my journal I'm going to be honest here. It ripped my heart out. So it's ok if it isn't the Best/worst day and it just feels hard. And not best. 

Ty's last photo outside the house. 

I made him pancakes and let him have all the jam he wanted! I spent the last 10 years getting mad at him for eating too much raspberry jam. 

Saying goodbye to Logan. 

He was given a time around like 1:45 when his district was set to be dropped off. We have never done this before obviously so we had to kind of figure it out. 

We got there early enough to go eat. In and out in Provo had all of these boys with missionary tags there with their families. I'm sure they were doing the same thing we were. Ty didn't want to eat. He acted like it all wasn't a big deal but looking back I could tell he was nervous. And he didn't want a huge big goodbye from us to make it hard. 

We went to the church that was next door to take a few photos and let the little boys say goodbye. He told the boys they were a wuss of they cried. Honestly he said stronger words than that. I thought he was being rude but I honestly think he didn't want everyone crying and feeling bad because he would be hard for him. I don't know that but I really think that. 

You know I had this whole picture in my head of how this was going to go. The whole family gets out of the car and he hugs the brothers. Then hugs dad and mom. We are all sad but excited for him. Then he leaves. It didn't really go that way at all. 

We were told that you don't have much time in the parking garage so we told the boys to stay in the car. Come to find out they could have totally come out. You go through the security and they send you down to the parking garage. As you go in you can see a lot of missionaries who are currently in the MTC standing there and they are the escort. I was hoping Ty's friend Jack would be there! He was still in the MTC when Tyson got there. 

We drove up and got in a line behind other cars and Ty's escort came to help him. Bryan and I got out and the other kids stayed in the car. When I saw everyone's families getting out I told them they could too but they decided to stay in the car. I was a mess. I couldn't hold back my tears. Ty gave me a hug and told me it was ok. My boys are not used to signs of emotion where I'm the only girl. 

I was surprised to see Bryan having a hard time too. It made me feel better. I mean how can you send your kid off for TWO YEARS and not have it tug at your heart! The escort offered to take a photo for us. It was the pathetic photo below. This is the only place I will post this. I look terrible. 

He walked off and my heart shattered. My little boy. The one who played with tractors for hours. Loving the sand box. Almost always happy running around full time. It makes me cry thinking about it. He walked off and was gone. 

The parking garage- missing my boy already. 

Because Ty was so fast to leave we had to sit and wait behind the other cars. I look to my right and there is a line of cars saying goodbye. In front of us and behind us. They were all elders in this spot. And I kept thinking all of these families saying goodbye to their children for two years! We can't visit or see them besides a weekly phone call. Which is more than they used to get. 

Then the family right in front of us (like feet from the front of our car) said a goodbye like I thought we would have. One by one, saying goodbye to each family member. The girls were crying their eyes out. He was giving them these long hugs. Then the family had a group hug. And we just had to sit and watch them. It was had. 

As we drove out of the parking garage I literally said to Bryan what kind of religion is this! If it wasn't true who would do this? 

The drive home was quiet. Easton was fighting a lot with the boys but I think it's how he was processing his emotions. 

What a day. One down 4 to go. And I can say 7 months into this mission I just couldn't be happier with his decision to go on a mission. It's been so amazing for him and our family. And our weekly phone call is the highlight of my week! I still miss him like crazy though.